I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Randomize