you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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