what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize