You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
