Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?