i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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