Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
So squirting runs in the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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