Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Success! We fucked roommates!
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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