can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Randomize
