so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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