haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
