she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize