I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
