we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize