We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Randomize