i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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