I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize