watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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