the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
this will be a night to untag.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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