My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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