does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
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