You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
PANTIES FOUND
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