I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize