just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
