If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
areolas are like halos for boobs.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
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He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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