I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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