Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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