Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
