CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
