best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.