whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
