so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize