whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I want to fling myself into the sun
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
