It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
