SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
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