I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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