need another drink. this is the easiest way
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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