i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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