I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
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