I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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