she looked like the before picture.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Randomize
