So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Randomize
