I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
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