Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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