I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
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no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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