Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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