i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
