I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
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