I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
