Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize